A Bride's Story - Gratuity

Hey guys!  It's that time again and I have to say that I was reading Amber's blog, I realized that I had never thought about her topic today.  I pride myself in learning from my father how to take care of my servers in a restaurant or bar but I never really thought about all the other different people that take care of you in a celebration like this. I hope you learn as much from today's blog as I have. 



Week 17

Hello friends!! As some of you have surely noticed, I always write the week at the top of the blog and writing “Week 17” just now really bugged me out! It’s been 17 weeks since Dan asked me to be his wife and while it seems like time is flying by…it feels like we were just in Asheville yesterday!

As usual, I struggle with what to write about that I think will be helpful to the masses, but I think I have a good one this week. Gratuity! A lot of people take this for granted and assume that any service charges automatically go the serving staff and you’re done. Many places have a service charge on a bill (ranging anywhere from 18-35%), this is not guaranteed money for the serving staff that is taking care of you and your guests. Some places take a portion of the service charge for the “house” to assist in payroll, supplies, etc. and others do give it all to the staff. I would suggest reaching out to your venue and asking what their policy is and how it will be split amongst the staff. Throwing the servers at your wedding a little extra isn’t necessary, but it is a nice thing to do. Especially early on so that you take whatever impeccable service you were expecting and send it through the roof! When I reached out to my venue to ask their policy, they were pleased and shocked. I guess it doesn’t happen often and while I completely understand, it also makes me a little sad. As a bride, we have a zillion things to think about, but taking care of those taking care of us, should always be at the top of the list!!

Bartenders generally make their own separate wage (often times it’s a shift pay of $50 + tips) and don’t generally need to be tipped out more, but make sure that your guests are doing the right thing. As someone who has spent a good portion of her adult life behind a bar or serving tables, getting extra will always make them happier overall, even if it’s just $20. Most guests that have ever been to a wedding have learned that throwing a $20 (or higher) in the bartender’s tip jar at the beginning of the night will make sure the bartender remembers what you’re drinking and tossing a little more in every few drinks will nearly always guarantee that even if the line is long…the bartender will have your beer sitting on the edge of the bar for you. This is a tested and proven theory of mine at MANY weddings over the years!

As for other vendors, I have reached out and asked professional opinions on this because I haven’t done this before and wanted to be sure that I was giving you the correct information. If you are paying for a service (planner/florist etc.) a tip is not necessary, but if your vendor went above and beyond, feel free to reward the exemplary service. If they did exactly what was expected and you have paid them for their service, at least send a thank you note and write a review of the company on any site available. Just as you relied on reviews to choose your vendors, other brides will be doing the same. Help the vendor and help the new brides to be! If you aren’t sure about giving cash, but want to do something nice above and beyond the thank you note…consider a small gift. Whether you know that your planner cannot live without Starbucks or your photographer can’t get enough movies…find something that would mean something to them and however small, it will be appreciated. I hope that this was helpful and stay tuned next week when I discuss the bar: open vs. cash.

Until next time, my friends!


Be sure to check back tomorrow as we take a look at WinMock at Kinderton.  A venue nine miles west of Winston-Salem, North Carolina and next week we will take a look at the different wedding apps that are out there today.

If you haven't followed me on Instagram yet, be sure to check out our Follow-Me contest at a chance to win disposable coasters. Until next time -  stay warm and Be Sure to Share your Love on FACEBOOK!