Something Old... Something New... Something BORROWED and Something Blue...
So, by now, you’ve heard all about the somethings old and new. Today, I really want to talk about your “SOMETHING BORROWED”. This is probably one of my favorites of the old traditions, simply because of the meaning behind it. Something borrowed symbolizes borrowed happiness, an item from someone that is in a happy, successful relationship. Imitation is the highest form of flattery, right? So you borrow from a happy couple to, hopefully, predict happiness in your marriage.
For me, it was certain that my “something borrowed” would come from my mother. My parents are the ones who taught me to love, in the good times and the bad.
My dad is a military man. He’s been in the service since before I was born, and he doesn’t seem like he plans on getting out any time soon. And honestly? It was a fun way to grow up. Living on the military base was great. What wasn’t so great was the news we got when we lived there. In 2003, we found out that my father was being deployed to Iraq. It was a tough time for our family. I think we were all kind of a lost for a while. We were certainly scared. But while he was gone, he sent us packages every few weeks. Little letters for my two sisters and I, and pages to my mother. Sometimes they made her cry, sometimes she laughed at his anecdotes. But in one package, he sent her something very special. They came in a beautifully carved wooden jewelry box. The most beautiful set of pearls that any of us had ever seen. She was so happy, and when she put them on, she absolutely glowed. My mother isn’t the kind of woman who spoils herself. She went without a lot of times to make sure that she could give us everything that we needed. To see her in something so beautiful is a memory that I’ll always hold close.
When she offered to let me borrow her pearls for my big day, I almost cried. I thought back to the day she opened that box, and I couldn’t help but be overwhelmed by the idea that she would let me wear them.
I can only hope that my “something borrowed” will bring me the happiness that my mother has. That I’ll one day be the kind of wife and (eventually) mother that she is. I hope that I’ll be able to be as supportive as she’s been, whether my father was home or far away. I hope that I’ll be as selfless as she was. I hope, most importantly, that I’ll be as strong and brave as she was. My mother taught me that marriage isn’t easy, that it’s something that you work at every day. But she also taught me that it’s worth it.
Something borrowed is supposed to give you luck, by borrowing the happiness of another couple, but marriage is about way more than luck. It’s about hard work and perseverance. If there’s one lesson I know my mother wanted us to learn, it’s that love isn’t something that just happens, love is a choice. It’s a decision that you have to make every day, whether you want to or not. It’s not going to be easy, and it’s not always going to be what you want to do, but that’s what you have to do if you want to make your marriage work. My parents’ anniversary is at the end of the month. More than 20 years together, making that choice. That’s the kind of happiness that I want in my marriage, in my future family. I can only hope those pearls will bring me that.